the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
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