I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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