At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
