Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
