the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
