I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
