I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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