So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize