oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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