You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
