i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
