I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
