why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
