I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
