Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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