I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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