I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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