i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
