There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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