dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
