My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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