hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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