i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
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