Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
