Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I just want to make out with him forever
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
