I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
