you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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