This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
ok first of all what the fuck
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
