he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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