Me too!
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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