32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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