Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize