My brain says no but my pants say off.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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