ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize