Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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