It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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