Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Rumble strips road head = magical
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
