Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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