In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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