Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
