god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
