do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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