Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
