is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
