Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
