This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
We are all done wearing pants today
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
