wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
well, you know. whores of a feather.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
