how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Randomize
