That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
