i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
